Tuesday, August 28, 2001

James' Addiction

Fifth Wheel
tripped all over my friends at once as they were starting to unwind 
had a feeling i was losing 'cause as they moved along i was falling far behind 
i've got a frame full of good intentions that i left back at home to rot 
thought that to stay underground and go streamline i'd be strong now i know i'm not

every day's a week now a search for identity the ground below my feet has got the best of me
and i'm tired of always changing i'm tired of being seen
the path is leading homeward bound only god knows where i 've been 

i got sick of all my friends at once as they were starting to unwind 
had a feeling i was losing 'cause as they moved along i was falling far behind 
i've got a box full of small inventions that i left back at home to rot
thought that to stay underground and go streamline i'd be strong now i know i'm not

many months i've been gone now i've learned from all i've seen 
turn around and face southward bound this has got the best of me 
and i'm tired of always changing i'm tired of being seen
the path is leading homeward bound only god knows where i 've been 

i'll keep looking for an answer until my eyes have gone blind 
i've run myself in circles and made it through this time 
with one foot on the platform one foot on the train 
i'm going back to richmond to wear that ball and chain

and i'm tired of always changing i'm tired of being seen
the path is leading homeward bound only god knows where i 've been



It's impossible for me to determine what I will be like tomorrow, but I'm relatively sure that I'm not going to be feeling better. It could be depression, it's got that amorphous feeling. That cloud that has descended, but I think the manic part is over-rated because I don't have too many highs. Moments at best.

Any living through chemistry.
missing ... someone
regretting ... things that were me-misinterpreted
loving ... the only way I can, completely
shaking ... like an addict
detoxifying my soul minute by minute
there is no methadone for necessity